19year Old Ghanaian Girl Benadicta Suicide After Her Love Making Video Leaked [See Video]

 Its Very Sad Benadicta Yeboah nahnah abynah is Dead, The Ghanaian Girl who Became Famous After a video of her and her boyfriend Making Love Hit

The internet Allegedly Committed Suicide, Benadicta Yeboah who was only 19 years old and had A Bright Future Ahead of her was A SHS Graduate. She just completed Adventist Girls Senior High(2014) at Ntonso on the Kumasi – Mampong Road, Benedicta Lived at Kwadaso Estate, Just One Silly Mistake Ruined her Entire Life… Well hope This Sounds as finally warning to all girls around the world…Her Close friend yesterday Announced About Her Death on Instagram… May her Soul Rest In Perfect Peace…Amen . Click Here To Download Love Video

EPL: Manchester United vs Chelsea match .... History

Louis van Gaal of Bayern Muenchen and Jose Mourinho of Real Madrid smile prior to the Franz Beckenbauer Farewell match between FC Bayern Muenchen and Real Madrid

Jose Mourinho will be looking to improve on an already remarkable record againstManchester United when his side travels to Old Trafford.

Mourinho first wreaked misery on United when his Porto side famously knocked them out of the Champions League in 2004.

Mourinho has faced United while manager of Chelsea, Inter Milan and Real Madrid, and his record against English football’s most decorated team is impressive; in 18 games, Mourinho has been the losing manager just twice.

The victor in eight of those games, Mourinho watched from his rosy position at the top of the table as Van Gaal’s United stuttered to a 2-2 draw at West Brom on Monday, a result that widened the gap between Chelsea and United to 10 points.

Van Gaal will take on his former pupil – Mourinho was on the coaching staff at Barcelona when Van Gaal was named as manager in 1997 – for just the second time. The Portuguese has the one-up after his Inter Milan side beat Van Gaal’s Bayern Munich in the 2010 Champions League final.  

Diego Milito’s brace handed Milan the title that night, and Mourinho may rely on the services of another Champions League hero on Sunday. Diego Costa (hamstring) and Loic Remy (groin) are both set to miss out, giving 36 year old Didier Drogba the chance to make his first start in the league since returning to the Blues.

KICK-OFF: Sunday, 4pm

PAST THREE MEETINGS

Chelsea 3 (Eto’o (3)) Manchester United 1 (Hernandez), Premier League, January 2014

Manchester United 0 Chelsea 0, Premier League, August 2013

Manchester United 0 Chelsea 1 (Mata), Premier League, May 2013

STATS

The last man to score a goal in this fixture at Old Trafford was Juan Mata, playing for Chelsea.

Manchester United have had a player sent off in two of their last three league encounters with Chelsea.

If Chelsea keep a clean sheet it will be their third successive at Old Trafford. The last time the Blues managed to keep 3+ clean sheets there was a spell of five between 1968 and 1972.

United have won only six of their last 22 league games against Chelsea.

ODDS

Manchester United to win: 3.0

Chelsea to win: 2.52

Draw: 3.6

SANI ABACHA, Nigeria’s Most Enigmatic Ruler

INTRODUCTION

What if I tell you that General SANINEGERIA MOHAMMED ABACHA, Nigeria’s seventh military head of state and the most popular Kanuri person in the world was regarded as the most patient man on earth? My Mum, the Ogidi Abiyamo herself never forgets her airport encounter with him, she was thoroughly stupefied at his height. It was fifteen years ago. A man of diminutive stature (5ft, 6inches). A man of fire, iron and steel, the General lorded absolute power and unbridled authority over 120 million souls.

COLOURFUL: General Sani Abacha in full colours with a serene pose. Abacha was the first officer in the military to rise from the rank of a 2nd lieutenant to that of a General without skipping any rank

Not even Generals dare cross his path. Those who did, knelt and wept before him while he offered them tissue paper to wipe their salty tears. Not even a plea from the Pope could melt his heart. Mandela begged him to no avail. No one messed with Abacha. He was gentle. Listening. Cunning. Daring. Attentive. Dangerous. Brave. Brutal. When an American ambassador was irritating the late maximum tyrant, he almost paid with his life. But who was SANI ABACHA, Nigeria’s most enigmatic ruler, and the first head of state to die in office without violence (a man of many firsts as you will soon see)? Why and how he almost blew General Diya out of existence? Why his last son was shot in 2011? His links with America’s most secretive Christian group, Boko Haram and Imam Abubakar Shekau, its leader and Nigeria’s most wanted man? And many more…

 Abacha was the first officer in the military to rise from the rank of a 2nd lieutenant to that of a General without skipping any rank. With shiny black shoes, Abacha strides past troops at the Nnamdi Azikiwe International Airport, Abuja in 1996. Known for his beautiful handwriting, here is Abacha’s signature. General Sani Abacha being decorated by the former military president, General Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida. Abacha was already a General by the age of 40 and he became the Head of State before turning 50, one of the youngest in the history of the country. The Taciturn Kanuri General & Nigeria’s Most Enigmatic Ruler.

OGAGUN (General): With shiny black shoes, Abacha strides past troops at the Nnamdi Azikiwe International Airport, Abuja in 1996.

Known to many as an incorrigible kleptomaniac who will stop at nothing to succeed himself in power, Abiyamo invites you on a spellbinding journey into the rise, rise and fall of the dictator and lawn tennis lover whom IBB called the Khalifa. When IBB was leaving the ‘throne’, he retired all the service chiefs with the exception of this man: Sani Abacha (in 1989, IBB cut the Armed Forces Revolutionary Council, AFRC from 28 to 19 members, Abacha was one of the survivors and IBB would later make him the Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff the same year). Adjust your chair, stretch your legs and let’s learn more about the gripping story of a soldier of audacious strategies who proudly bore his Kanuri tribal marks beneath the darkest of goggles.

Known for his beautiful handwriting, here is Abacha’s signature.

General Sani Abacha being decorated by the former military president, General Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida. Abacha was already a General by the age of 40 and he became the Head of State before turning 50, one of the youngest in the history of the country.

The Taciturn Kanuri General & Nigeria’s Most Enigmatic Ruler.

Known to many as an incorrigible kleptomaniac who will stop at nothing to succeed himself in power, Abiyamo invites you on a spellbinding journey into the rise, rise and fall of the dictator and lawn tennis lover whom IBB called the Khalifa. When IBB was leaving the ‘throne’, he retired all the service chiefs with the exception of this man: Sani Abacha (in 1989, IBB cut the Armed Forces Revolutionary Council, AFRC from 28 to 19 members, Abacha was one of the survivors and IBB would later make him the Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff the same year). Adjust your chair, stretch your legs and let’s learn more about the gripping story of a soldier of audacious strategies who proudly bore his Kanuri tribal marks beneath the darkest of goggles.

The service chiefs of the Ibrahim Babangida administration.

From left;- Chief of Naval Staff, Admiral Murtala Nyako, Chief of Army Staff, Gen. Sani Abacha, Chief of Air Staff, AVM Ibrahim Alfa and the Inspector General of Police, Alhaji Aliu Atta.

Source_ Newswatch, August 13, 1990. IBB regularly purged his council replacing the military brass with the rare exception of people like Abacha and Nyako who were retained through IBB’s tenure. (Courtesy: Uche Nwokoye).

THE MILITARY BOYS: Stepping out of a Nigerian Air Force Puma helicopter, IBB, Abacha and other senior armed forces officers arrive to oversee Exercise Fast Strike. (COURTESY: Embassy of Nigeria, Washington DC, USA)

The General giving a brisk salute. At this stage, suffering from liver cirrhosis resulting from chronic alcoholism and using lipstick to mask thinning and cracked lips, former President of Mali, Alpha Oumar Konare begged Abacha to step aside and take good care of his health.

A much younger Sani Abacha beaming with smiles.

Unlike other leaders who had ‘humble’ backgrounds, Abacha was not born into squalid poverty. As a matter of fact, his was a prosperous family with his father owning a successful trucking business in Kano State, while two of his brothers also later had their own businesses. The family which migrated to Kano in search of greener pastures, also had a bakery they named ‘Canteen Abacha’.

El Jefe (The Boss)

-A Kanuri man (Abacha is NOT Hausa or Fulani, that is quite important as some people tend to lump the entire north together as ‘Hausa-Fulani’ bloc, Hausa is not Fulani and vice versa), he was born in Borno State on a Monday, the 20th September, 1943, grew up in Kano and blended so well that he lies in the soil of the ancient city after he gave up the ghost on another Monday half a century later. His father was positioning him to take over the family’s bread baking business and he ensured he got a good education so as to stem the tide of illiteracy in the family although young Sani would be notorious for his truancy rather than astronomical academic wizardry. At about the same time, the late Sardauna of Sokoto, Sir Ahmadu Bello, was promoting a ‘northernization’ campaign which saw the influx of many eager and enthusiastic lads into the military and other institutions. One of them was a Kanuri boy. Sani. A much younger Sani Abacha beaming with smiles.

General Sani Abacha and his lovely wife, Maryam in their much younger days. He looks very nice with the shirt and tie while Mama Kowa is also looking radiant with the necklace and top.

-City Senior Primary School, Kano. -Kano Provincial Secondary School (finished in 1957). -Government College, Kano (1957-1962), now called Rumfa College. -Nigerian Military Training College (NMTC) (now called the Nigerian Defence Academy, NDA), Zaria, Kaduna State (1962-1963) Alongside Major General Rabiu Aliyu (an army engineer who refused to accept any political appointment throughout his career and Lt. General Oladipo Diya, Abacha was of the pioneer set of the NDA).   -Mons Defence Officers Cadet Training College, Aldershot, England.

He sure loved his hair full, thick and well-combed.

-General Sani Abacha also had further training: -School of Infantry, Warminster, UK (1966, 1971) -Armed Forces Command and Staff College, Jaji, Kaduna State (1976) -National Institute for Policy and Strategic Studies, Kuru, Jos (1981) -Senior International Defence Management Course (SIDMC), US Naval Postgraduate School (NPS), Monterey, California (1982). IBB also attended NPS and finished in 1980. NPS is a fully accredited research university operated by the United States Navy. In a thesis written by Daniel A. Castro in the same institution in 2007, he accused the US of backing Abacha in a clandestine manner. He wrote:

 In addition to Al Qaeda, the U.S. also has to contend with the endemic hatred for U.S. foreign policy around the world. U.S.-backed repressive rulers such as the House of Saud in Saudi Arabia, Suharto in Indonesia, and General Sani Abacha in Nigeria, while discreetly making deals with their American patrons and often enriching themselves from oil revenues, have proven their piety to the masses by encouraging the state-controlled press to demonize America. 

With former US Secretary of State, National Security Advisor, Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff and Commander of the US Army Forces Command, General Colin Luther Powell. Abacha (the Boss) meets the Powell (the SuperBoss) in 1991. In this picture, General Sani Abacha is being honoured with the Legion of Merit (LOM) (Commander Degree, which is equivalent to a US military chief of staff or higher position, but not to a head of state), America’s sixth highest military award. The US has been accused of being a major backer of the Abacha regime. In the 1980s, Abacha was in the United States for a course. Same with IBB. Both guys would later rain terror on millions of Nigerians, lending credence to the theory that both could have been nothing more than American agents, subservient to their American masters but putting up a show in the countries they rule. In the citation, Powell said: “…his (Abacha) personal efforts during a crisis in Liberia and direct support of the Economic Community Monitoring Group (ECOMOG) and Economic Community of West African States (ECPWAS) operations, ensured the humanitarian treatment of both civilian and military forces who bought the conflict to a rapid conclusion and established law and order during a period of total anarchy.” Later, Powell advised Abacha not to take over. I guess that advice went unheeded.

While in the Nigerian Army, Abacha held the following posts: -Commander, 2nd Division Training Depot -Commander, Support Wing -Chief Instructor, Nigerian Army School of Infantry, Jaji (1971-1975) -Commander, 2 Infantry Brigade, 1975-1978 -Commander, 9 Mechanized Division, 1981-1983 -General Officer Commanding (GOC), 2 Mechanized Division, 1984 -Chief of Army Staff (COAS), Nigerian Army, August 1985 – April 1990 -Chairman, Joint Chiefs of Staff, December, 29, 1989 – September 2, 1990 -Chief of Defence, September 3, 1990 – November 1992 -Secretary of Defence, Chief of Defence Staff, 1992 – November 16, 1993

Playing chess with the future of Nigeria: Obasanjo, Danjuma and IBB. To Obasanjo’s left is Abacha standing.

While a student his academic exploits become murky as some reports indicate that the former Nigerian ruler did not graduate from high school before proceeding to NMTC. The intellectual height and the depth of Abacha’s sagacity is a subject of intense debate with colleagues like General Olusegun Obasanjo dismissing him a dull personality, an ‘expendable brute not expected to rise beyond the rank of a warrant officer.’ Some even cited his not attending Sandhurst Royal Military Academy as evidence of an intrinsic lack of intelligence. But Abacha had a way of stupefying his opponents and those who underestimated him. He eventually became the Commander-in-Chief of the world’s most populous black nation. That doesn’t sound like what a stupid dimwit can achieve.

Priapism.....

This is an abnormal condition in which the penis, the male sexual organ, becomes erect in a sustained, purposeless and unregulated fashion not caused by sexual stimulation. It fails to return to its natural resting state within about four to six hours and therefore becomes painful because the blood which has flowed into the organ is prevented from draining away back into the body as a result of the factors which we shall discuss below. It is a medical emergency. Two of the cases I have seen in my career will help to illustrate the potential nature of this problem.

In the first case, I was still a youth corps member serving in Delta State and spent most of my evenings covering a private hospital. One Friday evening, a young man of about 35 years was escorted into the facility by about eight other men, all of them agitated. He wore a creambabanriga and held it away from his body. He admitted that he had used a locally popular aphrodisiac called ‘Bura ntashi’ in the hope of showing his new girlfriend how potent he was. Unfortunately, he failed to meet her at home that particular evening and went to the home of another. That one was home but was not disposed to an outing because her parents were home. Frustrated, the man went home to his wife who was still bleeding from a recent delivery. Even after several attempts, there was no relief of his erection. He then realised there was a problem. He called his friends to follow him to the hospital.

He was admitted and placed on drips. He was placed on heavy sedation and iced packs were placed around the penis. Nothing worked. My boss then did not know what else to do and I, a “bloody corper” was none the wiser. After four days of unrewarding treatment, he was referred to the Oghara University Teaching Hospital, Oghara, a One-hour-drive away. His penis remained erect.

A year ago, I was faced with a two-year-old sickler who suffered the same problem. He had not taken an aphrodisiac and was certainly not sexually stimulated when he suddenly developed a penile erection that would not go down. He was brought to the hospital by his mother. The father would not show up for several days, in fact just hours before he was discharged, because he believed that the mother of his son was determined to fleece him of some hard-earned money. He was now a successful lawyer. The woman was the maid at his parents’ home some years earlier and an illicit affair led to the birth of the boy. By now, however, I knew what to do and an emergency procedure at his bed-side under sedation was enough to relieve his problem. He went home in a few days.

The first patient almost certainly ended up with an organ he would never properly use again. The second one had a quick intervention that salvaged his organ but was by no means a guarantee that it would not reoccur because of his genotype. Here are some of the common causes of this stressful malady. These include certain disorders of the blood like:

• Sickle cell anaemia; This is the most common cause of priapism in young males as seen in one of the examples above. This is an inherited disorder in which the red blood cells are abnormally shaped with the result that they could occlude some of the vessels in the penis and block the flow of blood. This prevents blood from flowing out of an erect penis and that persistence causes priapism. People who have the sickle cell trait sometimes also suffer from this problem.
• Leukaemia; In this condition, the blood cells tend to clump together and thus leads to a cascade of events similar to what is described for sickle cell anaemia above.

The next group of causative factors are drugs. As seen in one of the examples above, the use of certain medications can easily lead to unintended consequences. Some of these drugs are as follows:

• Medicines used to treat psychotic disorders such as Olanzapine and Thorazine.
• Blood thinning drugs like Warfarin and Heparin.
• Antidepressants such as Fluoxetin (Prozac).
• Oral medications used to manage erectile dysfunction such as Sildenafil (Viagra), Tadalafil (Cialis), Vardenafil (Levitra). It also includes local formulations like Bura ‘ntashi and Opa eyin.
• Certain injections which are used to manage erectile dysfunction like Papaverine.

The third group among the various factors which can cause this malady is as follows;

• Excessive intake of alcohol is sometimes a cause.
• The recreational use of drugs used for the treatment for erectile dysfunction as named above.
• Use of illegal drugs like cocaine and marijuana.

The last group of causative factors includes the following;

• Injury to the genitals, the pelvis or to the vessels that supply the penis with blood as might occur in a road traffic injury.
• Poisonous venom such as from spiders for example.
• Development of blood clots within the vessels of the penis.
• Injury to the spinal cord including certain cases seen in prisoners put to death by hanging.
• Carbon monoxide poisoning such as from generator fumes.

The treatment of this condition is as follows:

• Ice packs applied to the swollen penis and the perineum could assist in reducing the swelling. However, this is uncomfortable and patient cooperation is not guaranteed.
• Aspiration: This is achieved by using a needle to drain the blood from the penis after the application of a local anaesthetic agent or after some sedation.
• Surgical shunting to insert a device into the penis and allow the diversion of blood so that normal circulation can be restored. This can also be achieved without a device and is often done openly in many hospitals in Nigeria.
• Intracavernous injection; This is the injection of alpha agonists which cause a narrowing of the blood vessels that supply blood to the penis and reduce the swelling.

When the treatment of this condition is offered promptly, the outlook is quite good. When it is delayed, however, as is often the case with many patients in Nigeria who arrive late in the hospital or where the expertise to deal with the problem is absent, the prospects for recovery are pretty dim. The latter is symbolised with the first case narrated above. The penis may then become something more like a cord. Sometimes, worse consequences result with the penis unable to nourish itself thus causing progressive ischemia. The penis begins to darken and could develop gangrene. The person’s life might be at stake unless a penile amputation, is performed.

There is a variant of this condition seen in women and known as clitoral priapism or clitorism. It is unrelated to any sexual desire and was first described in 2001.

Erotic Literature — Part 3: The Stranger

Sitting on a worn leather L couch in a friend of a friends house, can in hand, sipping away while music roared and the crowd grew. He sat anxiously, totally ignorant of the hustling and bustling party around him. He was waiting, waiting to hear from her. He hadn’t heard from her in two days. It was strange, she never implied that interest was dwindling or that boredom was creeping in, so if that was the case it certainly wasn’t apparent.

He finished his can, opened another and sat back down. He took his phone from his pocket, nothing. Placing his phone on the table he slumped back into the couch.

“Hey! Stop being so bloody anti-social!”

He turned around following the voice. It was Chris, beckoning him to join in the beer pong, he stood up, reluctantly and made his way over……

20 minutes into the game and he had resided to the fact that it wasn’t his forte. Swaying away from the table, he stumbled into a group of students from his class, jokes were made about his appalling lack of ability at the game which everyone seemed to be watching.

“At least he has his looks” giggled a girl he vaguely recognised, he looked at her, deep into her dark brown minstrel like eyes, totally engaged. It was only as he zoomed out he noticed her perfect  sallow skin and quirky smile. She wasn’t dressed like the rest of the girls at the party, in their short skirts and dresses, she wore ripped skinny jeans, black converse a white Beatles print t shirt and a leather jacket. He re-joined the conversation, embarrassed by how long he’d spent ogling her. He tried to keep his focus what people were saying but was constantly distracted by her, her eyes like magnets to his. Suddenly his trance was broken as she spoke, offering him a cigarette; he didn’t smoke, but accepted without hesitation.

Stepping out into the back garden it was quieter,  colder. Through a cloud of smoke appeared her face, lips first, parted slightly he awaited contact, her kiss was harder than he imagined, biting at his lower lip, his hands found their way around her waist, up her back, through her hair. Her breath was hot and sweet, visible in the cold. Her hands explored beneath his t shirt, squeezing down his jeans, finding his hard cock.

Fumbling backwards, to a corner in the garden where the heater stood,  she kissed down his front, opening his belt, taking his cock into her mouth, she licked and sucked him slowly before sliding a condom down his shaft. Undoing her jeans, she stood up and pulled them down to her knees, turning her back to him, hands pressed against the cold stone wall. He crouched behind her, his knees behind hers. She pushed her ass up into his crotch as he pointed his dick downwards and plunged deep inside her. He moved slowly, kissing her neck as he slid in and out of her hot wet pussy.

Holding her hair in one hand, he pulled her head back while with the other he reached around to circle her clit. She started to moan louder, grinding back into him faster and faster, she panted ‘yes….fuck yes’ picking up his pace he too felt the growing wave of orgasm looming, waiting to crash down upon them. Rocking back and forth on his cock she pushed him over the edge as his cock started to pump while she frantically collapsed into orgasm, his dick still hard inside her.

It was cold yet both their faces were flushed and glistening with sweat. They dressed briskly and re-joined the party, she winked at him as she disappeared into the kitchen. As if in a euphoric trance, he instinctively picked up his phone and his heart skipped a beat as he read;

1 Message Recieved

Real Madrid vs Barcelona: With £850m worth of talent on show, El Clasico is the most expensive football match in history

Real Madrid welcome fierce rivals Barcelona to the Santiago Bernabeu on Saturday evening, in a clash labelled as the most expensive in football history.

Both teams are lucky to have a plethora of talented and world class players amongst their ranks and it is estimated that the players on show add up to almost £850m.

Real Madrid have in their side the current FIFA Ballon D’Or winner - Cristiano Ronaldo, who cost them a world-record fee of £80m back in 2009 from Manchester United and the Portuguese international has quickly established himself as a Real legend.

In the same summer, Real Madrid also spent £30m to bring in French international Karim Benzema to the capital from Lyon and he has since become the perfect foil for Ronaldo, as the both of them look to set to continue their formidable partnership on Saturday.

 World record signing Gareth Bale, who cost £87m, will not play in the match

Ronaldo’s Ballon d’Or and world football rival Lionel Messi is yet to command a transfer fee after coming through Barcelona’s youth ranks, but it is estimated that the Argentine would command at the very least £100m if Barca were ever to sell him.

World Cup stars James Rodriguez and Toni Kroos were two of Real’s major signings this summer, with the combined price of the pair coming to almost £95m. Add the signing of ex-Levante goalkeeper Keylor Navas and their overall summer spending tops £100m.

Of course, the biggest and most publicised signing of the window was Barcelona’s purchase of Liverpool striker Luis Suarez for £75m. This was despite the fact of his four-month ban for biting Italy defender Giorgio Chiellini during this summer’s World Cup. The striker has now completed his ban and is likely to make his competitive debut on Saturday for the Catalonian side.

One of the bigger names missing the upcoming clash is Gareth Bale, who misses out through a buttock injury. The Welshman cost the club £87m back in 2013 and if he was included in the match day squad then the overall total would increase dramatically to nearly £930m.

In the same summer Madrid splashed out on Isco from Malaga and Asier Illarramendi from Real Socieded for almost £30m each but neither are have so far justified their hefty price tags.

 Lionel Messi is a Barcelona graduate but he'd be worth at least £100m

Brazil star Neymar's transfer fee is somewhat of a mystery, but he is currently the third most expensive player in the Barcelona squad; his price tag has been quoted at somewhere between £50m and £80m. If Suarez, Neymar and Messi all start on Saturday, then the combined total of the three accounts for more than a quarter of both 16-man squads (£227m).

Both teams haven’t just bought their entire squads and have some players who have come through the ranks starting on Saturday. Real’s Iker Casillas and Daniel Carvajal are both products of their academy and Barcelona’s world- renowned ‘La Masia’ academy graduates - Sergio Busquets, Xavi and Andres Iniesta could all have an important role to play.

8 signs you are not ready for relationship

A young girl asked me this question recently and I quote “When do I know I am ready for a relationship?” and I was like... There is no cookie cutter answer to this, but as always I will give my perspective based on what I have been through and past suggestions that have been successful. I want to stress we all have a love tank that needs to be filled, but we don’t have to fill that tank through the opposite sex in the confines of a romantic relationship. The need for companionship often leads to developing unhealthy habits that only delay having a healthy relationship partner. The truth is this - When you can be happy alone, then you are ready for a relationship. 

With respect to that, Here are my 8 signs you are not ready for relationship:

1. You struggle with insecurities. 
Insecurities only make our relationships worse and not better. You will always have those situations where arguments and problems blow up because of insecurities. In some cases of insecurities you are only seeking the relationship because of your insecurities because it makes you feel better about yourself. 

2. You have not healed from past pains or bitterness. 
When we refuse to heal and forgive we allow the person in our past to have control over us. When you forgive you release that pain and the control it has over you. Holding anger from a past relationship will only make you bitter. I discuss this topic deeper in my blog “Healing before Love” click here. If bitterness is your issue read the blog “10 steps for overcoming bitterness and resentment.”

3. You have not taken responsibility for the part you played in the failure of your past relationships. 
We always hear people say “it was not my fault” or “he did this or she did that” the truth of the matter is that we are all participators in our pain- there are no victims. We have to always look ourselves in the mirror and ask the questions, what is wrong with me. And how can I improve to make my life better? I think we rarely see this type of deep introspection, but we often see the victim mentality. Good or bad your past relationships can make you a better person if you allow those experiences to inspire growth.

4. You don’t love yourself. 
Often people don’t understand what this truly means. Loving self doesn’t mean, “ I am doing me” or “It’s all about me”; that is simply an immature and selfish thought process. Loving self means you understand your self-worth and you do things daily to improve who you are and the lives of others around you. When you love yourself, you treat people kind and you seek a mutual oneness with those connected to you. When we seek relationships without loving self, our self-worth is tied to the connection of another person. Our self-worth goes up and down depending on how the person with whom we’re connected feels about us. So, when your relationship partner puts you down you believe what they say. Develop a health self-love before seeking relationships.

5. You’re selfish and have a critical spirit. 
Selfish people can’t love unconditionally, period, so this is something we must be mindful of. If you are selfish, you only love in the moment and once that moment is over, you are gone. When things are hard, difficult, or not your way, you bounce as well. A critical spirit is based in pride. When we are critical, we kill the spirit of other people. Work on these things before seeking a relationship.

6. You are fresh out of a relationship.
This is a huge one! I see this far too often. Give yourself time to heal before rushing into a new relationship. I’ve been in a relationship with a beautiful girl who was not ready for a relationship, because she was not healed from her last one. Even before we got serious, I knew it was a bad idea, but I moved out of my human emotion. When we make emotional decisions, in most cases, it leaves us heart-broken. Rebound relationships may numb your pain, but will delay your healing. Give yourself time to heal. The longer the past relationship, the longer you need to take to heal.

7. You can’t be happy alone. 
The ability to be happy alone is a prerequisite to being ready for a relationship or marriage. 

8. You’re still dealing with your ex. 
Don’t pursue relationships with people if you are still dealing with your ex. It’s kind of sad that I even have to discuss this one, but of course we know people do this all the time. Make a decision about your ex before creating something new.