Now, I’m well aware that there are PLENTY of women out there who are very happy to be single, love going out with the girls, having fun with guys and just leaving OUT the whole relationship thing for a while. That’s cool, this article is for the girls who JUST WANT A BOYFRIEND. I know you’re out there…I’ve met you.
please.
Text message:
Guy: ‘Hey, do you want to do something this weekend?’
Girl: ‘Yeah sure, whatever you want to do I’m up for’ WRONG.
If a guy you’re into has texted to ask you to do something with him, you’re doing well. He’s taken the all important first step and put himself out there. You know he wants to spend time with you so now it’s time for you to meet him half way by suggesting something. He’ll be happy that you’ve agreed to rendez vous and relieved that you have taken some initiative. A better answer would be ‘Yeah sure, going to a birthday party on Saturday but how about we meet for a drink before?’
This reply will;
1. Show that you’re plans for the weekend are not reliant on him, but you still want to see him.
2. No way suggest that you will be spending the night together because you’re meeting your friends AFTER him, not before.
3. Ensure that if the two of you are having a great time, you can always extend the date to him going to the party or just continue the drinks into the night.
4. Ensure that if it’s not going well and it’s full of awkward silences, you have an escape route, and so does he.
2. You’re too intense…chill out
They say ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day’ well the same goes for relationships. You might get on really well, you might have kissed on many occasions, you might have even met and hung out with his friends but to get to the stage in a relationship where you have the right to ask ‘Where were you last night, you didn’t answer my calls or texts and you never told me what we were doing‘ is very, very far down the line, we’re talking close to marriage. Relax, let it progress naturally and let him breathe. Make your own plans and never presume the two of you are doing something, if plans have not been made, he will make his own, as should you.
3. You need to let yourself go and start having fun
Your friends think you’re fun, you have a great laugh with them when you do your silly voices and impressions. You have awesome chats and pre drinking with you is always good craic. Why can’t you do this with a guy? At the end of the day, a guy wants a girlfriend that he’s attracted to (which will be the initial reason you caught his eye) and then someone he can just hang out and have fun with. Someone he considers a friend with the added bonus of sex. The best present a girlfriend ever got me was when she made a fort in the living room out of sheets and duvets and pillows. We watched dvds and played xbox in it all day. I know she did it as a present but we both had a great time. It’s things like that will make the two of you closer.
4. Playing hard to get – you’re doing it wrong
Girl: Oh my god the last time I saw you was at that party and I’m pretty sure you made me do a tequila!
Guy: Yeah and then you spilled that pint over me!
Girl: You did look pretty ripped under that top though…
Guy: Ha…thanks
Girl: *touches arm* ooh still going to the gym I see…
Guy: Yeah… eh so how about we go for a drink next week
Girl: Hmm,If you’re lucky…we’ll see
Right, so this scenario is almost an exact replica from a scene in Made in Chelsea (which was on in the background while I was doing manly things like taking down the Christmas Tree). This girl throws herself at some guy, flutters her eyelashes and shamelessly touches his arm and chest. He’s thinking ‘sweet, I’m in here’ asks her out and THEN she plays hard to get? No, no, NO! You look ridiculous.
Playing hard to get is an art and yes, it works but you need to do it the right way around dammit! If you have already flirted with him then playing hard to get looks stupid, he’ll just think you’re an eejit.
Be aloof, once you say ‘Yes’ to a drink he’s offering to buy-the game is up, either you like him or you’re just a drink scabbing whore. Once you give him your number, if he says ‘Right so I’ll give you a text maybe we can go for a drink’ Don’t say ‘Ha, we’ll see about that’ Okaaayy…. wait, what?
It’s good to be mysterious and maybe even a little stand offish but once you respond positively to his interest, then it’s too late to be hard to get.
5. If you dress single, you’ll stay single
It’s no secret that guys love a short skirt and some sexy cleavage, we are attracted to it, like magpies to silver. You look great, it’s obvious as you walk through the bar and every guy you pass leers at your visible skin. If you’re looking for a kiss with some possible sex, then fantastic, you’re dressed appropriately! If you just love dressing up with your girlfriends and feel totally comfortable showing off your body then more power to you, it’s great to see confidence in people. IF however, the only reason you’re FREEZING in bare legs and suffering AGONY in your high heels is to get a man, then you need to rethink your outfit choice.
Believe it or not, guys notice girls in jeans and t shirts too. The pretty girl at the bar having a laugh in a blazer, jeans and boots is interesting. She’s clearly comfortable, not shifting from right to left because the balls of her feet are going numb. Not constantly fixing and pulling at her top because it’s a little too tight. Either she already has a boyfriend, or she’s just comfortable going out to a bar to have fun and if she meets someone, she meets someone but she’s not going to flaunt everything she’s got just to get attention. Whatever the reason, I’d like to find out.
And just on a side note; Men are not stupid. We too notice that you’re wearing fake eyelashes and bad hair extensions. You’re not fooling anyone with that thick foundation and those fake nails. We have a fair idea of what you look like underneath it all and we’d like it so much more if you laid off a bit. Make up is supposed to accentuate your best features not make you look like Ronald Mc Donald. If only you knew how many guys look at really good looking girls and say to eachother ‘far too much make up though’, you don’t need it, okay?
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