++18 Head Banging: 15 Things No One Tells You About Car Sex

There’s a reason the bed has become the go-to place for relations: it’s comfortable, spacious, warm and private. However there are times when the bed is either inaccessible for some reason, or you’ve fallen out of favour with it; I tire of you, sheets and pillows, my carnal desires can no longer be housed by you.

You haven’t got money to hire a hotel for the night and you can’t get caught at the bus stop again, so what are you going to do? Hop in the motor and start revving the engine, that’s what. However, potential public indecency accusations aside, there are a few hiccups along the sexual highway that you can only truly understand after the event.

1

It’s not as straightforward as it looks in the movies

2

But they weren’t exaggerating on Titanic, it really does get steamy

3

There’s almost no way to be graceful or glamorous without being in a limo

4

Finding the right location takes a while

Nothing says romance quite like a quiet lay-by.

5

Someone is going to bang their head against something

6

You spend some of the time wondering ‘…can anyone actually see us?’

7

You’ll have to try a few positions until you can find something right

8

Cleaning up can be interesting if you’re not prepared

9

You notice just how dirty your car really is

10

Car suspension isn’t really made for bonking

11

It’s hard enough fitting in a bed when you’re tall, let alone the back of a car

12

It can get pretty nippy if you don’t bring a blanket

13

And you basically can’t cuddle or spoon afterward

Hmm…

14

From then on whenever you see a parked car in a quiet place at night, you know what they’re up to

15

Car sex ain’t that big of a deal… but it is kinda awesome

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